A Bad Investment
by MethodicChaos
Summary: The twins decided to have a little fun, even though they knew they would get in trouble with a certain Shadow King. Of course, it wouldn't be too bad, right? After all, they've seen the worst of Kyōya before. But, they hadn't known of a bad investment.


**Disclaimer: Why do we even need these? It's called 'FanFiction' for a reason. Oh well! XD**

**Uhh... I have been gone from this site for a while, but I actually posted another story!**

**Without further ado.**

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><p>:-:-: Before School Club Meeting :-:-:<p>

"Ne, ne! Takashi, look!"

The said senior turned to the call. Mori, though looking quite calm and indifferent, was having multiple heart attacks when his eyes traveled to his smaller, toddler-looking companion. Meanwhile, on the other side of the room, two carrot tops shook with laughter as they hid not-so-discreetly behind a couch.

What was the sight to behold?

Hani was swinging upside-down giddily, his legs hooked on the chandelier, brown eyes glittering with excitement and arms outstretched, giggles flooding from his sweets-craving lips, the crystal diamonds of the chandelier tinkling as they swung back and forth.

"Mitsukuni."

:-:-:-:-:-:

Those unscrupulous twins were in for it now.

The Shadow King sauntered along the halls to the Third Music Room, leaving a trail of darkness where he passed. Tamaki had even wept for a vase of chrysanthemums that withered when Kyōya walked by, his darkness sucking the life out of them.

Tamaki and Haruhi, who the blonde king dragged along, followed behind the raven-haired boy, keeping a distance between themselves and Kyōya.

Kyōya's composed demeanor frightened them. He was much too calm for someone who just learned about the twins'...prank. Usually, the young Ohtori would at least show irritation. Of course, he rarely yelled. As a matter of fact, less than a handful of people have seen him yell. But still...his reaction was far too sedate.

_/-/-/ Flashback /-/-/_

_Kyōya's glasses were repositioned just as they began sliding down his nose._

_The dark-haired genius sat in his last, empty class, savoring the rare silence, finishing up a chapter in his leather-bound book before he headed to the club. But, of course, noise always seemed to find and follow him. Or, rather, the SOURCE of the noise always found and followed him._

_"Mother!" Kyōya's blonde 'husband' practically kicked the door open—which was utterly moronic because they were sliding doors—and barged into the once peaceful room, a certain brown-haired 'commoner' tugged along. With a sigh, Kyōya bookmarked his novel, placed it gently on his desk, and looked up at his purple-eyed friend._

_"Yes, father?" Kyōya asked, as usual humoring Tamaki's 'family' setting for the host club. Kyōya remained unfazed despite Tamaki's frantic antics._

_"T-Twins..! Shameless!...Hani-sempai!...Chandelier!" Tamaki stuttered incoherently, making absurd motions as his face flushed from the chaotic excitement. Without giving Tamaki another second for possible redemption, Kyōya raised an elegant, questioning brow at the only female club member. Haruhi oof'ed when Tamaki almost hit her as he sped to his 'Corner of Woe', depressed at Kyōya's negligence._

_Sweatdropping, Haruhi elaborated Tamaki's useless ramblings. "Hikaru and Kaoru thought it would be funny to tempt Hani-sempai with sweets." Haruhi sighed when Kyōya gave her a look that clearly said 'And I should be bothered with this because...?' Which was really just Kyōya's polite version of 'Get on with it.'_

_"Well..." Haruhi hesitated, knowing that the part she was about to reveal would irritate the Shadow King. "The twins sort of found your 'Sweets Stash' for Hani-sempai." Haruhi chuckled nervously as she air-quoted with her fingers. She had personally stumbled upon the stash Kyōya kept for the senior's sugar-coated necessities while she was still the host club dog, consequently receiving a promise of a fee from Kyōya if she let word of the stash get out when he had walked in on the scene. Haruhi would have rather used the word 'threat', as opposed to 'promise', but for all intents and purposes, which included her physical safety, Haruhi decided to de-evil-ify Kyōya's intentions. She was rather fond of staying in Japan._

_"Hani-sempai's sweet stash?" Kyōya asked, sounding detached._

_"A-Ah..."_

_Haruhi shivered at Kyōya's false smile, his glasses glinting unnaturally as he pushed to his feet and tucked the seat back under the desk._

_Kyōya needed only that final affirmation, his mind already piecing together what had happened next._

_/-/-/ End Flashback /-/-/_

Pale, slender fingers wound around the golden door lever of the towering, pink doors that led to the Third Music Room. Without even stopping as he pressed the door open, Kyōya stepped into club room with one, continuous fluid movement.

"What is the meaning of this?" the twins' laughter ceased promptly when Kyōya's chilling voice sweeped into the room. The curtains were ripped and torn from the rungs, some tables were upturned, a number of ceramics were broken, and several other things added to the disorder. Hikaru and Kaoru turned from the sight of a sugar-high Hani-which they had found sufficiently entertaining-to face the Shadow King with their identical Cheshire Cat grins.

In an instant the twins' broad smiles slid from their faces when their eyes laid upon the Shadow King.

Instead of the expected small scowl, or even the occasional expression of exasperation, Kyōya's face was donned with a generous host smile. It was the simple smile that only he could execute. The false smile that was so...pleasant...that the victim would all but willingly disregard the lie. Even so, it was difficult for most to detect it. It was the smile that was so frightfully perfected that no normal being would be able to escape its captivating clutches. Kyōya only ever used it as a charm or a mask.

And it frightened them.

"K-Kyōya-sempai!" the twins stiffened as Kyōya slipped into the room, his shoes tapping as they met the floor, the sounds resounding in the obnoxious silence that enveloped the room when the twins ceased their laughter. Even Hani seemed to have stifled his giggles and had stopped his swing on the chandelier, now perched like a cat watching with amusement at the scene below, the stick of a Blow Pop sucker protruding from his mouth.

"Well..." Kyōya tilted his head, eyes closed from the charming smile he still sported, "Disregarding the fact that I already have my own pieced-together version of the events, would someone like to explain what is going on?"

:-:-: 5 Pathetic Minutes Later :-:-:

"...A-And so! Kaoru and I decided to share it with Hani-sempai!" Hikaru—who just threw together a lie about bunnies, dinosaurs, and the sweets stash—chuckled nervously, knowing he didn't fool the youngest Ohtori one measly bit. Well, one had to try right?

"Hmm... Your version seems to differ from mine quite a bit, wouldn't you say?" Kyōya asked, the pleasant tone in his voice sending chills down the other hosts' backs. Haruhi had even opted from pushing Tamaki away when he clung to her. Though, no one would blame her for choosing a touchy-feely blonde over a misleadingly happy Shadow King, who, they still had not forgotten by the way, possessed blood type AB.

"U-Uhh... What is y-you're version, exactly?" Hikaru and Kaoru stuttered simultaneously. They knew Kyōya'd nail it right on the head.

Bullseye.

Spot on.

They were just buying time, and they knew it. Heck, they knew Kyōya knew they were just stalling!

:-:-: 7 Agonizing Minutes Later:-:-:

"...and, giving each other excited grins, you hopped down the chair and lured Hani-sempai to the stash." Kyōya said plainly, pushing up his glasses with his middle finger as he finished his prediction of what had occurred, "As to what method you used on Hani-sempai, it does not matter...though, it could have something to do with the empty plates of cakes—which we were going to offer our guests, by the way—that lead to the stash. What does matter is how you will replace the sweets Hani-sempai has already eaten, and those that we cannot serve our guests."

The twins shivered at Kyōya's predatory gaze. Shadow King indeed.

"U-Uh...Y-You see..." Kaoru shot a nervous glance to his brother, asking for help.

"We were hoping...I mean, w-we...uhh..." Hikaru stuttered, "Ah! I mean...we know you already have a plan for that!"

"Y-Yeah! You probably already have some sort of fundraising scheme just itching to come out!"

"A brilliant trick up your sleeve, for sure!" the twins finished together.

Crap. That's what that was. A load of horrible, stinky crap. Flattery never worked on Kyōya... Ever.

"You do realize that flattery will get you nowhere, don't you?"

"Who said we..."

"...were flattering y-you?"

"It's just the truth!" the twins finished together once again, arms over each other's shoulder, and hips touching.

Hiitachin signature pose.

The twins braved the grins on their faces, the corners of their lips twitching slightly.

Kyōya readjusted his glasses once more before pulling out a chair from under a table that appeared miraculously from thin air.

Such was the power of the Shadow King in his element (AKA the Third Music Room).

Then, Kyōya sat himself at the head of the table, gesturing for the others to take seats, particularly the twins.

Tamaki jumped ten feet in the air when Hani rushed by him, laughing as he hugged Usa-chan, to take a seat by Mori. Staring incredulously at the blonde senior, then to the high chandelier, Tamaki let himself be pushed to a seat by Haruhi.

"Now, without further stalling, let's discuss this."

The twins, Tamaki, and Haruhi gulped nervously, while Mori stared blankly at Kyōya, and Hani stifled his sugar-induced giggles.

:-:-: An Eternity Later :-:-:

"...Gorge out my eyes! Cut off my ears!" Tamaki cried as he and the others-except Kyōya-exited the Third Music Room.

"D-Devil! Kyōya-sempai-"

"-is the Devil!"

Haruhi spun on her heels and pointed an accusing finger at the twins.

"Never again!" Haruhi had an angered, yet frightened, look in her eyes. "We have officially gone to hell and back! And Kyōya-sempai was just TALKING about what we would have to do if anyone pulls a stunt like that again!"

"We didn't know he'd react _that_ badly!"

"They were just sweets!" Kaoru added.

"But sweets cost money...Especially the kind you rich people buy! You know how Kyōya-sempai hates losing money." Haruhi sighed, "Then there's Hani-sempai getting cavities, the things he could've broken, the things he _did_ break, the cake you lured him with, and all other stuff Kyōya-sempai could've dragged into the situation!"

"My daughter is correct! This is all..." Tamaki pointed dramatically to the twins, "...your fault! What were you troublesome twins thinking?"

The twins looked at each other and shrugged. "We were bored!"

Haruhi sighed, running a hand down her face. "Anyway... Did you guys find his reaction...unusual?"

Sharing a glance, the hosts shivered at thought of the frighteningly pleasant smile Kyōya had during the whole 'sermon', and agreed that the Shadow King's reaction was, indeed, unexpected. He'd been acting strange—at least, in Kyōya standards—lately.

What was with Kyōya today?

:-:-:Earlier that day:-:-:

The helpers of the Ohtori Mansion scurried away, their feet scuttling with as little sound as possible. Most of them had been working for the family for years, and thus they knew when, how, and who to stay away from on particular days.

Today was "Be-Ten Thousand-Feet-Away-From-Kyōya-Bocchama-Or-WISH-You-Were-Fired" Day. It usually succeeded a day when the Host Club King made his visits to his Bestest Friend Ever, the third Ohtori son. Such a day was yesterday.

Kyōya had been reviewing his Notebook™ while Tamaki danced in the background, making absurd gestures as he talked about how lovely their host club duties were. After nearly two and a half hours of his nonstop rambling, Tamaki popped up behind Kyōya—who didn't flinch, of course—and prodded for him to go to a commoner's store with him.

Finally, Kyōya's tolerance reached below depths he had never thought possible. Although, having a melodramatic, blond French for SIX hours straight as a visitor _may _have something to do with it. Kyōya ended up convincing Tamaki to go to a commoner's store virtually via the Shadow King's laptop, to which Tamaki responded:

"_Commoners have Internet?"_

Kyōya, dear Kyōya, as brilliant as he was, did not foresee the consequence of allowing Tamaki to lay even a single finger on his precious laptop. Perhaps it wasn't such a bright idea, Kyōya now thought as he made his way from the dining room where he received the bad news from his father.

Kyōya had never regretted ignoring Tamaki until now. Especially when he had said:

"_Oi~! Kyōya! Look at this. This place called 'Walmart' looks so…Commoner-y! And it's doing really well in the stock market!" _

Tamaki had taken it upon himself to "assist Kyōya's economic endeavors."

:-:-:-:-:-:

"Kyōya, I understand you frequent yourself in the stock market," his father had said casually during breakfast.

"Yes, Father."

"It is truly disappointing…"

"What is, Father?" Kyōya resisted raising an elegant brow.

"Just this morning, while checking my own stock, I noticed that one particular company's, Walmart's I believe it was, percentage…shot down," Yoshio continued, noting that whatever he said wasn't ringing any bells for Kyōya. "Of course, I myself had not invested in such an unreliable stock; but for the sake of gaining advantages, I traced those who HAD invested."

"And, what was the result."

"As I had predicted, unknown, inexperienced holders were the ones who had invested. But, there was one exception. I had not anticipated finding your name on that list, Kyōya."

"I beg your pardon, Father, but I don't recall ever investing in such a-…" Kyōya froze in his seat, his utensils barely gripped by his fingers from momentary shock.

"_Oi~! Kyōya! Look at this. This place called 'Walmart' looks so…Commoner-y! And it's doing really well in the stock market!" _

Kyōya regained his composure, silently placed his utensils down, wiped his mouth and hand with a napkin, and masked his emotions so well even his father couldn't identify his expression. "Excuse me, Father, brothers."

:-:-:-:-:-:

"Eh? Tama-chan is quiet today, ne Takashi?"

"Ah."

Five of the Host Club members spared a glance at the particularly large 'Corner of Woe' that housed their King.

"D-Darkness! Never again! … N-NO! Get away!"

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><p><strong>Oh~ Tamaki. We all love you anyway!<strong>

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